If you have read my “About Me” page, then you may recall that I teach 5th Grade Sunday School at the church I attend. I love teaching 5th grade. The kids are old enough to really start to think, but they don’t quite know everything yet. 😉
This is the second week we have talked about Joseph in Sunday School. I love Joseph! If ever there is an example of how I want to be, it’s in Joseph. I just wish I could get there without going through what he went through. I mean, I really hate it that I have to learn all of my lessons the hard way. I would think after all these years, I would be able to take the gentle nudge, but no! I’m stubborn. I need the kick in the pants.
As I studied and prepared for this lesson on Joseph, I read a couple of commentaries about the passage. I like to know what other people think about the passages and often one of them will point out something I have never noticed before. That is precisely what happened this week.
The first part of the chapter talks about Joseph and how he was purchased by Potiphar and the recurring phrase is “The Lord was with Joseph and gave him success in everything he did.” It didn’t take long for Potiphar to see how much better his estate was doing under the care of Joseph and it didn’t take Mrs Potiphar long to realize Joseph was handsome and desirable. Uh oh… While Joseph did a great job of fleeing temptation, Mrs Potiphar told her lies and got her revenge. Joseph went to jail for a crime he didn’t commit.
Genesis 39:19-20 (NIV): 19 When his master heard the story his wife told him, saying, “This is how your slave treated me,” he burned with anger.20 Joseph’s master took him and put him in prison, the place where the king’s prisoners were confined.
In “The Wiersbe Bible Commentary for the Old Testament,” Warren Wiersbe makes a statement about this event. He says, “God often removes our ‘crutches’ so we’ll learn to walk by faith and trust Him alone.” This really struck me in a new way as I read through these scriptures this week. You see, I’ve had God take away my crutches too.
The first thing you need to know about me for this story to make sense is that I LOVE singing to Jesus. I sing all the time. I sing at home. I sing at church. I sing in the car. You know how sometimes when you’re driving along, you come up on someone who is obviously lost in her own little world and singing in her car at the top of her lungs? Yep! That’s me. I sang in the choir, the praise team, and lead preschool choir. Almost every way I served the Lord had its base in music. That was my nitch. The musicians were my community. I was happy and excited to be serving God in a way that allowed me to do what I loved to do.
More history: I grew up in Florida, but for the last 18 years I have lived in Southwest Virginia, otherwise known as the “Allergy Capital of the World.” Not long after moving here I developed seasonal allergies, then asthma, then Laryngopharyngeal Reflux. I cruised on with all of those things for many years and was able to control them just with diet and avoidance for a long time, but not anymore.
Five years ago a terrible bout with the flu sent my health in a downward spiral. I struggled with uncontrolled asthma for two years before my doctors were finally able to figure out all of the interactions and get things back under control. My asthma manifests as a horrible cough. I don’t wheeze so much as I start coughing and can’t breathe. It’s terrible for vocal cords. As if there weren’t enough things going on, during the two years of uncontrolled asthma, I developed Irritable Larynx Syndrome. So then, not only was I coughing, but every tiny trigger made me cough uncontrollably. The gist of all of this is that I sustained vocal damage due to all of the coughing. I had to stop singing or risk further damage.
I was completely devastated. I felt like I imagine Joseph must have felt. There I was living my life the best I could in service for God and then suddenly, Boom! It was over. I wondered what I had done to deserve this. I felt like I had lost everything. I had lost my ministry and my community and I went into a deep depression. I realize now that God was taking away my crutches. He was developing my character so that I would learn to live by faith and learn to trust Him alone.
The Bible makes it seem as though Joseph just kind of went with the flow as things happened. We don’t really know how he reacted except that if he did struggle it wasn’t for long because in every situation we are told, “The Lord was with Joseph and gave him success in everything he did.” So I’m thinking that overall, Joseph had a pretty good attitude. I, however, did not.
I walked this road that God laid out before me, but I did it kicking and screaming (sometimes literally). I fought every step of the way. The Lord was with me, but I did NOT have success in everything I did. In fact, several years later, I am still wading through damage. I had to do it the hard way, but I’m so glad that I can point to Joseph and say, “Do it like he did.” Don’t do it like I did.
During the time of my exile, God brought people into my life from different places that became my new support system. I was no longer dependent upon one group of people. God used this time to develop some new relationships that I treasure. And, ultimately, He sent me to teach 5th grade Sunday School.
The good news in this story is that The Lord has allowed me to recover almost completely. I will probably always have some difficulties with my voice because medications don’t quite fix all of the physical damage. I don’t sound bad, but I don’t have a lot of stamina in my voice. I’ve become a sprinter instead of a long distance runner. Even with medication, I have to be extremely careful with what I eat because every one of those no-nos affect the way my voice sounds. I still have to avoid scents (perfumes, lotions, candles, etc) like the plague.
God really did remove my crutches and I really did fall flat on my face. God took away almost every person and every ministry that I had been leaning on instead of Him. It was an extremely difficult time to live through. And I am so thankful He made me do it, because I finally gave up and gave in. I went back to Him whole heartedly. I am learning more everyday how to trust Him completely and how to lean on Him alone. Just like with Joseph, God used that experience to strengthen my character and my relationship with Him and I wouldn’t trade that for all of the singing in the world.
How has God taken away your crutches? What are you learning through your experiences?